A Long Distance Relationship just like any other romantic relationship is an intimate bond between the two individuals who are geographically apart from each other. In such relationships there is no physical or face-to-face contact between the two individuals, and can only connect virtually (thanks to the technological advancements of today). A long distance relationship comes into existence when one of the two individuals have to move or is already geographically away from their partner.
The Most Commonly Known Reasons for Such Geographical Separations are Stated as Follows-
1. EDUCATION FACTOR– Most common long distance relationships are those of the college students, where it is also important to build up a career along with keeping intact with the person you love.
2. JOB DEMANDS – IN today’s time the passion to earn money has overpowered the relationship factor as a result of which most people fall into long distance relationship. It is commonly assumed that most long distance relationship do not survive for long and are likely to end as soon as one partner moves away.
IT is difficult to ascertain a set of reasons as to why Long distance relationship fail, but some of them are provided below–
♦ NO PHYSICAL CONNECTION
Human Beings want physical love as much as they want mental and emotional love and in the long distance relationship there is no scope of physical contact.
♦ IT DEMANDS WAY TOO MUCH
Except the fact that technology isn’t enough to fulfil the wants and desires of a relationship. Calling, texting, Skype etc all this is good but not as good as physical touches and connection. It takes a lot of patience, time and money of the two individuals to keep their love going. After a point of time the person starts to feel as if the relation is demanding way too much and he/she cannot concentrate on the thing for which he/she has shifted to the other place. Basically you have no clue what the other person plans to do in reality.
♦ JEALOUSY STEPS IN
It is natural tendency to be jealous if our close one gives more attention and importance to someone else. It is at this point one of the partner starts to lose trust and faith in the other and the words and promises seem to turn out futile.
♦ UNDERSTANDING AND COMMUNICATION ISSUES
There would be a lot of problems and the major ones would be of understanding and communication. IT is not always easy to solve all the issues on phone and eventually both the partners will get frustrated and these issues and problems will grow, finally resulting into a break-up.
♦ EVERYTHING WILL EVENTUALLY PROVE WORTHLESS
As soon as a couple moves into a long distance relationship the real motive of relationship slowly starts to disappear. The reasons for which two people come into a relationship- Love, security, trust and happiness slowly tend to fade away. Still couples try to cling onto each other and keep building false hopes because it is difficult to find someone with whom you can fall in love all over again in the same way.
There is nothing new in the fact that running a long distance relationship is not an easy task. It is like committing to a job that requires your 24/7 focus and attention. Nobody claims that long distance relationships are going to be easy. Your friends, family, close ones everyone would discourage you and make you feel as if it’s not worth the pain, but at the end of the day it is you and your faith in your partner that keeps the relationship going.
Though Long Distance Relationship Could be Tough and Challenging, Following are Some Tips to Keep your Love Strong and Alive-
1. BE FAITHFUL
Always keep in mind not to let the feelings of insecurity, jealousy, possessiveness, fear of losing your partner over power the love you feel for each other. Be open and honest about what you feel and solve the trust related issues that come up as soon as possible. It is true for both partners to undergo trusting issues to overcome these you need to interact more. For e.g. discuss about your routine at work or college and tell about all the new people you meet. If your partner is bit of an introvert try to ask him/her inner feeling. Make them feel good about themselves otherwise someone else will.
It is important in long distance relation to communicate but necessarily not in a way that you have to stick around your partner 24/7. Call up as and when you want, set-up routines in the middle of work to call up each other during lunch breaks or way back home. At the same time it is important to take out time for your own self and not stick to the phone. If you think your partner on other side takes less interest and you want them to miss you then go out and enjoy with your friends in order to make them realize you have a happening life of your own.
3. STATE YOUR WISHES AND EXPECTATIONS CLEARLY
Clarity of thought is the main objective which most relations fail to achieve. It is important to understand what your partner expects from you and you try to fulfill their expectations and desires. For e.g. do not be rude or behave badly to them specially when they have had a bad day. Even if you are angry or want to argue do it in a more polite and less disrespectful manner. Nothing goes against the ego if you use the magical words like Sorry and Thank you.
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4. BE CREATIVE WHILE SEX TALKING
While physical connection is an important part in a relationship, the long distance ones lack the opportunity of physical connectivity. It is important to keep the spark alive by sex talking. Not only that sex is a male dominated activity women can be equally impulsive and want it as much as men do. Talk dirty to your partner at unexpected times and situations.
5. SURPRISE VISITS
Visiting each other is the most important thing to do when it comes to maintain a long distance relationships. The desire to see and touch each other grows over a while and these visits prove to be stress buster for both the partners. Knowing each other’s friends and colleagues is another important factor that needs to be worked on. Sending each other gifts and cards on different occasions when you can’t meet up, makes the other person feel good about his/her partner and keeps the relation going on a good terms.
6. DEFINE BOUNDARIES
It is important to set boundaries for each other, what and what not to be done should be stated clearly. If a certain thing according to you is unethical might not be the same for your partner. It is always advisable to state certain behavior norms to your partner so that it doesn’t later on turns your world upside down. For e.g. if you think healthy flirting is something you can’t see your partner doing to someone else state it clearly and politely to him/her because you cannot impose your decisions on someone.
7. CHECKING SOCIAL MEDIA INTERACTIONS
It is important to keep a check on the social media activities of the partner. Keep posting pictures of the good times spent with each other. Tag them in the post you guys can relate to. If you feel something about your partner it is ok to check social media profiles because you can get to know the reason for your doubting. You don’t need to spy all the time but once in a while is alright.
8. GENDER DIFFERENCES
It is important to understand that girls need more pampering and care as compared to boys, it doesn’t mean boys need not be loved or shown care about but still girls need to be dealt with more softly and patiently. It is the guys duty to make her feel the special. At the same it is important for both the partners to respect each other as an individual and as a partner as well.
Handling long distance relationship is not an easy task and mostly people will tell you that because it didn’t work in most cases …